The other night I went to dinner at 'Margaritas' with some friends. This restaurant has the best margaritas I've ever tasted and that's probably the reason they named the restaurant 'Margaritas.' Anyway, on the weekend nights, they have a live band who does cover songs. After a song or two, people slowly started getting out on the dance floor. As I sat there watching these middle-aged men and women dancing, I couldn't stop grinning. A couple had caught my attention and wouldn't let go. I was mesmerized how much this particular guy was dancing! I mean, he was cutting a serious rug! Regardless if he was a good dancer or not, just the fact he went out on the dance floor with his girl was amazing! And I immediately thought, "I want that!"
Anybody that knows me, knows that I love to dance. I dance at home, I dance at school, I dance at work, I dance while shopping for groceries! I'm not afraid to bust a move when the mood strikes. (A song doesn't even have to be on for me to do a little shimmy-shake.) So it's safe to say that I don't care where I am or what I'm doing or what people think when the rhythm takes me over!
With this love of dancing, I began to wonder...how important is dancing in relationships?
Over the last 25 years, (OK, maybe just the last six) I've made some observations. There are four types of situations when it comes to dancing and guys:
1. You find a guy that is a great dancer who knows exactly what he's doing just the way you like it but you're not physically attracted to him.
2. You find a guy that you are physically attracted to but he doesn't have a lick of rhythm in his body.
3. You find a guy that you are physically attracted to and he says he's a good dancer and you've seen some small signs that he's a good dancer but he will not, at any costs, take you to the dance floor.
4. You find a guy that you are physically attracted to AND he's a good dancer AND he loves pulling you out on the dance floor to spin you around.
(The most appealing choice being 4, obviously. But that's very hard to find.)
I realize that dancing isn't that big of a deal to most girls, whether it be because they don't like to dance or simply can't dance at all. But for me, a guy that can dance is a total turn-on. It's fun, it's romantic, it's thoughtful...it's sexy! Dancing in public takes a lot of confidence and security in oneself, so seeing a guy that is comfortable and willing to dance says a lot more about him than just the fact that he has rhythm.
Now this next comment may rock some worlds so prepare yourself. Here is some high octane honesty coming at you. If the guy is into me and won't at least attempt to dance with me, when he knows how much I love it, then it is a borderline deal breaker. That's right! If he isn't willing to put his pride aside and swing me around the dance floor then I shouldn't be expected to sacrifice anything for him either. If you haven't figured it out yet, this isn't even about dancing at all. It's about doing things you normally don't like to do but doing them anyway for the person you care about because they like to do them. Whether it be dancing, or eating sushi, or watching scary movies, you learn to sacrifice for the ones you love because you want to make them happy. (Dancing just happens to be one of my factors.)
Through all of this, I've learned that maybe I am placing too high of a priority on dancing. It'd be a great bonus but it shouldn't be a complete deal breaker. I shouldn't blow off a guy just because he can't or doesn't want to dance. That would be like a guy blowing me off for being an OU fan when he's from Texas. It's not fair to anyone. Who knows, that guy that can't dance may be "the One" for me but I wouldn't know it had I snubbed him off cause he wasn't a Justin Timberlake.
Bottomline, I just want someone who knows that happiness with another person is about sacrificing and compromise. I want someone that I can have fun with, dancing or no dancing. (I can always turn him around so he learns to like it! Just kidding. Not really.)
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